Have you ever had all the sex, passion and intimacy you desire? Have you had it for a weekend when on vacation? Or have you worn your partner out on a good long evening? Then you fall into bed with a happy grin to begin your “normal” life in the morning. You go back to work, your home routine, and your busy schedule with work, family, kids and being there for others.
December is a busy month on top of your regular life duties. So if you have been good boys and girls maybe Santa can grant you your wish. Do you desire more foreplay, more intimacy, and more time to be intimate together? What is on your wish list?
Sometimes the wish list is not just about sex. Do you wish you and your partner could find the time to go dancing, attend a movie or even grocery shopping together. Can you enjoy a house project with the agreement you will not fight over it. Do you wish you could go the shooting range as often as you use to back when… you weren’t so busy? Any activity done together brings closeness and intimacy into your life. A relationship to be happy and sexually fulfilling takes work, just like building your business or getting ahead on the corporate ladder.
Why is Sex put on a back burner with everything else being more important? Why do you wait till you are too tired at the end of the evening? Only you can answer these questions.
Here is a term for you – Maintenance Sex. This is good/ok sex and keeps you well balanced. Just like taking your car in for an oil change, checking your tires, and balancing the wheels. It is a good thing. But sometimes you need to put pedal to the metal with high octane gas and floor it. Feel the acceleration pushing you back into your seat and the grin on your face as you hit a speed that is suited for a race track. Now that is fun. How about your sex life? Do you ever accelerate and discover energies that take you into orgasmic spaces that blow your mind? Would you love to feel that rush of passion and deep desire, but it went south for the winter. Are you asking, “HOW, do I do that?”
First, think out of the box. Do something, do anything different; make love in a different room, dress sexy or go buy some sexy male or female attire if you do not have any. Take your partner with you and make a sex date out of it. Give yourself an hour to make love when you are NOT tired. Start slow and stay slow for at least 20 to 30 minutes. Yes you can kiss and nibble, suck and lick and fondle but hold back on the intercourse.
So what if you have a partner that limits your sexual play, is not comfortable and refuses? They think it is “sinful,” “bad,” “dirty” “against their religious upbringing”. You name it, bottom line, they think you are over sexed or sick to want to do anything out of the box like; give and receive oral sex or anal play with fingers or anal plug. God forbid anal intercourse, which is not for everyone especially if you are well endowed.
Some couples love each other and are not sexually compatible. If you desire a good sex life and also desire to grow into old age being sensually alive with your partner, the two of you need to see a Sex, Marriage/Relationship Counselor before throwing in the towel. A good therapist will do one of two things. They will help you navigate your sexual differences and find a middle ground that is mutually acceptable. Or they will help you divorce with respect and kindness in your heart, even as your hearts are breaking. December is not a good time to make this kind of major decision as there is plenty of other stress going on.
In your heart of hearts, do you know that everything is great in your relationship except your sex life? If you love each other as much as you profess, then are you willing to open up your mind? Education is never wrong. Provide for each other.
Are you in a healthy relationship and sexually compatible? Are you just too busy, too tired or your schedules are opposite and you get 1 day off together and a few hours during the week? This is the story of one of my couples. They have figured out how to make that one day sexually playful and satisfying. They have committed to be sensual and intimate with or without intercourse when they have only a few hours together a few nights a week. They also sex text each other, leave notes on each other’s car with an assertive effort to drive by their work a few times a month. All this adds up to a better sex life and more intimacy. Their communication has improved with showing appreciation and desire for each other even with their limited time schedule. They are happier in every aspect of their lives.
Discover the gift Santa can bring you, undying love, passion, intimacy and yes a great SEX LIFE
